Good Decisions All Around

I recently read this cute little blog post by songwriter Matt Wertz on Storyline Blog. I'd recommend it, just a sweet little four minute read. This here Pep Talk Tuesday doesn't totally relate to the main point of that other post, but it is inspired by one of the side-points, so I thought I'd give credit where it's due.

You are a good decision maker. Incredible, actually. You have never once in your entire life made a bad decision.

You: Wait what? How can you say that? What about the time I decided to cheat on my 3rd grade spelling quiz? What about that time I entered a pizza eating competition and made myself sick for five days straight? What about that time I ran a red light and seriously injured another driver? What about when I decided to try cigarettes?

Me: Ok ok ok so there are lots of bad consequences that may have come from some of your decisions. But unless you ever decided to actually kill anyone, all your decisions were good. Here's the deal:

You make decisions based on what you predict the outcomes will be (good, bad, or neutral) and you hope for the best. But no matter what actually happens, it's all good. You learn, you grow, you excel, you overcome, you adapt, you achieve, you succeed. Ultimately, all your decisions have gotten you here and now, which is exactly right and perfect.

Whatever might immediately seem like a bad decision in quick retrospect will eventually clear up and there is goodness in it. There is. Somewhere. I promise.

Straight and Narrow Path to Recovery

Last Week's Goals:

1. Get all of my usual work done by Wednesday at noon. (A-) I got almost everything done by noon, then finished up a few last things and left work by 4. So I beat rush hour and had extra time to get in the zone before traveling. 

2. Pack, check-in, and time out our travel times ahead of time. (A+) Everything worked out perfectly. We parked at an off-site lot and took a shuttle to the airport. We got to the airport at 4:45am, security opened at 5am, we got through security by 5:20, bot to our gate and got coffee by 6am, and boarded the plane ay 6:20. Also, by some miracle I packed the perfect suitcase. I used every single article of clothing, and the only thing I lacked was one more pair of socks.

3. Be wise but not stingy with money. (B) I think we did a reasonable job, but it's hard to find the balance between one or two good fun splurges versus spending way way too much. 

Next Week's Goals:

It's all about recovery here! We ate unhealthy food, slept very little, and spent more money than usual. Time to balance. 

1. Eat healthy. I just spent five days straight eating delicious fattening foods. Brian and I just went to the grocery store and got tons of fresh healthy stuff to make up for it.

2. Sleep more. This goal will be easy once I make it back to my routine. I normally get over 8 hours every night, but on our recent trip to Seattle we were getting close to just 5 or 6 hours thanks to jet lag and a noisy barking puppy. 

3. No unnecessary expenses. May was such an expensive month. Moving to a new apartment is crazy expensive (administration fee, deposit, truck rental, etc.) and even though our vacation was really reasonable it was still much more than just staying home. 

Red Band-Aid Face

This past week I had an allergic reaction to two band-aids. On my face. 

Last Tuesday I had a couple of acne spots on my face that were red and irritated, so overnight I put a couple band-aids on my face to keep an ointment over them to help heal faster. I used some fabric adhesive bandages that were recently on sale, Kroger brand. They were really sticky, and stuck securely. I was pretty happy about this new brand at first, since some other brands sometimes slide off in my sleep. 

I woke up the next morning and peeled them off as soon as I woke up. It left VERY noticeable red marks on my face in the exact shape of a band-aid. I literally looked like I was still wearing some red bandages on my face. I kinda laughed, and figured my face was slightly irritated and it would go away within an hour or two. 0% worried at this time. I washed my face, used moisturizer, and drank my coffee like usual. Right before I left for work I looked in the mirror and thought, "It doesn't look better yet... I'll just put another layer of lotion on, and it'll be better by the time I get to work." I was 20% worried. 

I parked in the parking lot at work, looked in my car mirror, and thought a curse word in my head. I still looked like I had two red band-aid prints on my face. I was 45% worried. One of them was conveniently close to my ear and I could mostly hide with my hair. The other one was smack dab in the middle of my cheek, no hope of hiding it. 

Just my luck, at work I had go to a volunteer training meeting where I met about twenty-five new church volunteers for the first time ever. Thankfully nobody stared at it, mentioned it, or made me uncomfortable at all. I survived a whole day. When I got home from work, Brian wisely ignored it until I brought it up first. 

After dinner I asked, "You see these marks on my face?" And Brian was like YEAH. I read online some other people's experiences with allergic reactions to adhesive bandages. Everybody only has reactions to the fabric kind just like me, so from now on I will only buy the rubbery plastic type, and never Kroger brand. One person posted that her dermatologist identified it as a mild chemical burn, and it stayed visible for three whole weeks. I started freaking out, 100% worried. We were two days away from vacation and I didn't want these red band-aid marks in every picture. 

I've mentioned on this blog before that I never wear makeup. So I don't own makeup. I made Brian take me to the drugstore immediately and I attempted to buy some. I am completely clueless but I bought what I thought were the right things to mask the big red marks. I came home with the very palest shade of concealer and foundation from Mabeline New York, which I assumed was an okay brand because it was not the very cheapest available, and I've seen TV commercials for it that try to appeal to adults not teens. I attempted to put the makeup on, and the shade matched my skin well, but it wasn't totally opaque and the red marks showed through obviously. I was upset to say the least. 

The next morning, Wednesday, the marks were significantly diminished, and the makeup helped make it less noticeable. Thursday morning it was almost completely gone, and the makeup made it invisible. By Friday I didn't need makeup on it, and you could only see the marks if you were searching for them in the mirror like I was.  

I did NOT take a selfie with the red marks on my face because honestly I was upset and embarrassed about them. Almost a week has passed, and the rednes is finally gone. But in this picture below, you can still see the acne spot on my cheek, which gives you a good idea of where the big red band-aid mark was. 

Straight Edge

The first image is by someone anonymous, sent to PostSecret.
The second image is by me, inspired by the first.

In Nashville, the girls who lived the the apartment across the hallway would smoke pot all the time and it smelled so bad I would gag as I walked by. Why would anyone want to try that. How could anyone try that without puking.

Seven Years Ago

This past week I ran into my high school band director!

I hadn't seen him in seven whole years! 

We were waiting in a long line a Home Depot, so we actually got about ten minutes to talk. It was so funny to see him again. We chatted about our families, and I introduced him to Brian. He introduced himself by just his first name, which was weird to me. 

He was such an awesome teacher. He held us to really high standards, he yelled and screamed at us a lot, BUT we never once questioned how much he cared about us. He encouraged us in our faith, got to know our families, and encouraged us in our goals. He is really one of the best teachers I've ever had. 

Three of My Favorite Songs

When people casually ask, "What kind of music do you like?" I never know what to say without sounding pretentious.  The honest truth would be, "I actually only listen to about ten indipendent singer-songwriters on repeat, and wait years between new albums. Plus also Taylor Swift."
I hate how long that answer is, so I usually just say I like Country music. It's true, I like Country music, but I don't listen to the radio very often so I'm not up to date on the latest tunes.

Here are three songs I love, from songwriters I've admired for several years.

1. Steve Moakler - Wide Open
 

2. Ellie Holcomb - Marvelous Light

3. Andrew Ripp- Savior

Gifts For My Furture Self

People who identify as "a nice person" (that's probably most people) often go out of their way to help others. From the time you're a tiny tot, it's ingrained in you to be helpful, to not hurt others' feelings, to share toys, and to generally be healthy and safe whenever possible.

It's not a bad thing at all usually, but we are conditioned to think of others first. To value others more. To give rather than receive. My top Love Language is Acts of Service, so I enjoy finding ways to make other people's lives a little easier. Letting someone switch lanes in traffic. Making copies for my coworker. Cleaning up the classroom a little extra so that the janitor can do a little less.

But I'm learning that really just as important as those people, is myself. It's just as important for me to do favors for my future self. Just this week I tried out a few "gifts" for myself and I was so appreciative of my past self, I might start doing them regularly.

• Monday I checked all my Sunday School teachers' availability even though I wasn't done with their lesson plans yet. That gave me an extra day to find substitutes!
• I actually bought something at the grocery store with the intention of eating it for lunch, instead of my usual fallback on leftovers. 
• I stayed late at work yesterday so that I can leave early today. 
• I got some dried eucalyptus to try to cover up the weird carpet smell in our apartment.

Here are more ideas I'm hoping I can start implementing and stop being a dummy:

• Stop eating candy at work, and just enjoy one dessert a day.
• Write blog posts ahead of time to give myself a "day off."
• Set aside time to red, write, pray, breathe, clear my head. 

So I'm not totally there yet, giving myself all the gifts I deserve, but I'm learning. I'm a little closer to not being a dummy.